WARNING: Indecisive & wishy-washy Christian men may find this post hard to read.

Over the years, I’ve found myself in the middle of too many sticky marriage situations as a pastor. These are always very awkward and uncomfortable for the couple but probably the most for the third person in the room, the pastor. It seems like 9 times out of 10 the problem the couple is facing would be solved, or significantly healed, if the husband simply took the words of Ephesians 5 to heart and acted on them:

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church, Ephesians 5:25a (NIV)

Whatever people say or think about Jesus, I’ve never heard anyone call him indecisive, yet this is an epidemic that plagues Christian men and husbands today. As a result, their marriages lack passion and direction, their children lack confidence and security, and they have no plan or direction for the future.

Can you imagine a Christian praying, “God I’m not sure which choice I should make, Will you help me?” and Jesus answers in prayer, “I don’t know. What do you think?”. Yet, this scenario (or ones similar to it) play out countless times in Christian marriages and homes every day and it is the husband or father who is at fault. The truth for a Christian man, husband or father could not be any clearer from Scripture; NO decision, NO opinion, NO plan, NO leadership really boils down to NO Christ-likeness.

It’s time for us, as men who name Jesus as our Lord and Savior, to begin to emulate Him by the power of the Holy Spirit and

1. Be decisive,

2. Express a Biblically informed opinion,

3. Make a plan for our families with steps that are ‘ordered by the Lord’ and

4. Lead the way that Jesus has and always will lead His Church (His Bride).

So let’s step up, and be the men, husbands and fathers God has created us to be! Our wives and children will thank us for it!